Entry #2: Seeing Is Not Always Believing...

Cliche as that statement may sound, it is the truth for today's installment of Snott Spot.

It all began with a Doctor's appointment...After the clean bill of health, in which I passed with flying colors, I had one small and insignifigant eye "exam". "Piece o' cake" I thought to myself, until I put the dreaded hand over my left eye. Lo and behold, I couldn't read the 3rd line down. I was shocked, nay, decimated to the very core of my being (believe me, it was much more shocking in person, you had to be there). To think that me, the most amazing person ever (ever so humbly), had a busted seer?

Well today, I had to go to the Optician. A Dr-What's-His-Face, WHO DID UNSPEAKABLE HORRORS TO ME, checked my eyes.

Seriously people, if you're going blind, don't go see an Optician. Ever. Even if your eyeballs fall out of your head, don't succomb to the embarrasment of having your eye blasted with hurricane force winds with the excuse that they're "checking for eye pressure". Sure Doc, like I believe THAT one. What is there, a dial gauge that shows when I need to add a little air so I don't get a flat? Anyways, after that he started flapping his hands in front of my face, and somehow I'm just supposed to sit there and act like this is normal for everyone that walks through the door. Another lie. Then, he pulls out a light and proceeds to blast the back of my retina in an attempt to see into my eyeball. Doc, there's nothing in there but goop. Believe me, I was one of those kids that did the sheep's eyeball disection in 7th grade, so naturally I'm fully qualified. So I asked him, "Isn't that bad to shine a really bright light into your eye?" He replied, "No". So then comes the ultimate in logical conclusions...what's the biggest known light out there? Of course, the sun. Soooooo...What do think I asked next? Yep. "So then that means it's okay to stare at the sun for ridiculous amounts of time without any damage whatsoever, right?" He replied again, "No, that would be crazy".

Oh yeah Doc? OH YEAH? Well not as crazy as me going CRAZY ALL OVER YOUR CRAZINESS!!!!! Then I got up and punched him in the face and stormed out, making sure to thank the quite polite assistant on my way out.

...actually...

That didn't happen. He did the whole eye glass thingy-ma-jigger, flipping and flopping the lenses to see which one was better, and he made it so I could see the numbers...there I said it. Happy now? He fixed my eye problem. BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN I LIKED IT!!

In conclusion:

In many ways, I'd like to compare your modern every-day Optician with a ruthless medieval torturer. I think the comparasion would be, if nothing else, quite enlightening. *makes note to self*

I once was blind, now I see...yadda yadda yadda, blah blah blah, you know the end of the story.

P.S. GOAL FOR THE DAY

Say hello. to someone you don't know.

Have a good ambiguous "one".